This is Moosebase Alpha, come in Planet Earth...yea, all quiet again...
Figured that it was time for some sort of an update from here in the land of extreme freaky stuff. The oddest thing of late has been that life has been quite normal. Now, I know that would not bother many of you, but around here it just makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck.
It's been quiet...almost too quiet.
Two things in the news. One of which I don't get at all. Okay, I don't get either one. Seems some guy ripped of a bunch of people for $20 MILLION dollars, yet if convicted, he faces a fine of $250,000. Um, I am not sure about you but I would gladly pay out the fine. So his net profit from his ill gotten gains is $19.75 MILLION dollars. Um, yea. Justice, right...
Number two on the list is something I read on the BBC website:
Scotland is looking to outlaw the ownership of swords by individuals. HELLO! No guns, no swords, limited to itty-bitty knives. Hey, didn't Cromwell do that once already?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/4031405.stm
Here is a quote for ya from the article:
"There can be no reason for people buying swords off the street for use or to have in their homes," Jack McConnell, First Minister
Are boot-sales overrun with swords of late? Um...sword, concealed...right.
To interject a few euphemisms you may understand, Mr. First Minister "You are a total pratt! A git of the first degree, a ninny and a complete and utter tosser!"
But wait! It gets worse:
"It is not acceptable. The law in Scotland must be clear, the system must protect innocent victims and the culture of Scotland, particularly in our cities, in relation to knives and violent crime, must change," he said.
Protect the culture of Scotland? Okay, but there are no exclusions for re-enactors, fencers or heaven forbid the Highland Dancers. Dance a traditional dance, go to jail for 4 years. Regia ? Do not pass go, head directly to jail for 4 years. Oh, did you notice the expanded police powers? Yea, they can stop and search anyone suspected of carrying a knife. Pedestrians and vehicles can be searched without a crime being committed. Any knife, any person, anywhere, at any time. Boy would I be screwed!
All this seems to be brought about by some recent crime statistics. The first Minister stated "That 50% of the homicides in Scotland in 2002 were caused by knives or other sharp instruments."
What are "other sharp instruments"? Pencils? Ice picks? Pointed sticks? Gee, wonder why? How about no firearms for the general public for one. Wait till this goes into affect and the crime rate will show a rise in the use of cricket bats as the weapon of choice in homicides, then they will get outlawed too. I suggest polearms. You will never be accused of concealing it.
Outlawing swords and knives has been tried before. Know what happened? The birth of Kung Fu. Yea, China had outlawed all weapons for private ownership once. Even the communists let people have guns and swords for their own use now. Maybe we will see the new Scottish martial art we have joked about come to be. Swift kick to the mommy and daddy button with steel toed boots then punch to the eye as they lie on the ground. Then they can outlaw boots, too. Pretty soon, they will all be naked, and that will be quite funny.
So, I think this calls for some drastic measures.
Anyone care for a fresh hot, steaming cup of Scottish revolution? I'll bring the swords.
Well, next time I'll try to leave Europe alone and take some time to bust on the U.S.
With so much material, I am sure I can find something to occupy say 80 or 90 pages.
Till then,
Be mindful and awake
Um, for the $20M swindler, I believe all that money would've been seized... 'course, I don't expect that the victims will ever see it again as it then becomes evidence. And well, evidence has a way of going missing at times.
ReplyDelete0_^
Me
If you need a base of operations for your Scottish revolution, I know this person who has a flat right in Edinburgh *nudge nudge*. Parliment is just down the street...
ReplyDeleteWow... and I thought we were paranoid.
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone else have a strange urge to wait until the law is passed, then go and raid Scotland armed to the teeth with all things pointy?
No?
Okay maybe it's just the pirate thing going to my head.
Would that count as a medieval booty call? *waits to get pelted with blunt objects* Yes, I know that was bad! Don't kill me... >.> <.<;;;
~Karyl (I still need an SCA name. Yarr!!!)
This is the first time I have heard of Scotland actually talking about an out right ban. They have been talking about licensing for a while. Basically along the lines that Denmark uses. Which is not all that bad. However First Minister McConnell’s proposal would go far beyond that. But I don’t think there will much of an uprising since the first ban on the sales of knives is being started in Glasgow. With the major support by the nightclub owners they have even given the local government money to buy some of the metal detectors for the police to do the random searches. So the locals are giving the authorities to say hey I don’t trust my self do I have weapons hidden on me? I guess going along the line of thought that if you don’t do anything wrong you shouldn’t have a problem. But wait knives and swords are not the only thing being banned as sales. If you’re under 16 don’t plan on buying any spray paint in Glasgow. Guess you’re just not old enough to be trusted with it. “Halt give me all your money or I’ll paint you BLUE!”
ReplyDeleteAdam
Hmmm. This is what happens when you give a country their own parliament (or assembly as in the cas eof wales). They start demanding that everything be in two languages(despite the fact that only 10% of the population can read that language and it costs millions of pounds) or they threaten to ban swords. Thanks for the head sup though. I'll mobilise the troops. It could be quite funny. Imagine the news item
ReplyDelete"Thousands of angry armed vikings invaded London today and burned down the houses of parliament. A spokesmen for the vikings said 'We were trying to peacefully protest the proposed law banning swords, but then I guess we got here and thought what the hell, we were here anyway.' So saying the blonde viking and his beauteous female side kick clubbed an MP over the head and through him into the Thames."
Ben
Looks like we finally have the answer to the old SCA tee shirt about outlawing guns and carrying swords.
ReplyDeleteWell, I guess the next step is to outlaw pencils, pens, sewing needles, hypodermics, (sorry all you diabetics! All for the sake of national security!) butter knives, pocket survival tools, (Leathermans,) can openers, pointed sticks, lawnmowers, chainsaws, walking sticks, microphone cables, fans, cars, unicycles, duckt tape, anything you can buy from Lowes or Home Depot, bananas, peaches, pinapples, (you try callin' for help with a pineapple lodged in your windpipe,) and of course the Red Currants!
What about hands? Are they going to outlaw hands? Or pillows maybe?
Oh wait! Now I get it! I know what they can outlaw that will finally put an end to violent crime forever and ever! It's perfect! Without it, all the guns, swords, knives, pencils, etc. ad nauseum... are completely useless.
Lets outlaw free will!
We're already halfway there in the States!