Well, another multiday break from the blogger. Last night I had a stroke of good luck. I went with Judi to a Macromedia Usergroup Special meeting that was a worldwide net-confrence call that showed off their new suite of tools. Guess who won a copy? Yep, your truly. I go the new Studio MX2004. I am starting to think that the rest of the group mildly resent when we have some mondo prize as I always seem to win it. Colf Fusion Server 5...yep, 5k woth of software, mine. First release of Studio MX, retail about $900, again, mine. And now the new MX2004, again about $900, also mine. Needless to say, I feel enoug guilt about winning these I keep going to the meetings even tho a lot of it still flys right over my head, like a sonic boom. I watched the demos and Judi and I kept passing notes. It was real cool to me. Reminded me of being in High School again. Hard to explain to anyone, but maybe not if you think about it.
Todays rant:
Marketing people.
Okay, first, when the revolution comes the marketing people should be lined up and shot. No rubber bullets, just good old 100 percent lead. I can not stand most marketing peole. They have the same karma slime that used car salesmen do. How can someone be like that? LAst night was a good example. Ask a question, and if it didn't fit with the info they wanted to feed us, it did not exist. Would not that be wonderful in real life? Oh look a parking ticket. Nope no ticket there. *POOF* All better. Reminds me about something Bill Engval said about life would be much easier if we could have it like news casters. When things get too bad, just switch cameras and all is better. Camera 1:1000 people die in a horrid and very tragic manner while attending a kindergarden graduation being preformed by a group of blind nuns...Cut to Camera 2: Good news for egg farmers!
See? All better.
So, marketing is the art of the lie. Falsehood and diversionary tactics. Taking something bad and selling it to peole who follow along like sheep. These are the same people in IT who bypass the IT department and go directly to the CEO and sell him this wonderful whizbang program that does everying including make fries, coffee and gives you a blowjob. CEO buys it, proclaims it as wonderful and gospel for the company. IT department gets it and goes /Excuse me, this is a peice of junk you just paied 60 k for and we could have done it with freeware. It is buggy, crashes, dosen't do the job, and needs us to revamp all our hardware. The rebuild is going to run us 100k minimum and we have to sacrifice our lives for the next 2 months. So just why did you buy this?/
CEO:/IT will save us 20k a year for the next 5 years! Is that not great?/
IT: /Umm, Boss? Let me get this strait, your going to spend in excess of 160k plus overtime to save us a grand total of 100k?/
CEO:/Yes!/
It:/Were you dropped on your head much as a child?/
Can you tell I have been through this before.
If your a CEO and read this, take some advice: If your sick, you talk to your doctor before you go to the hospital and get surgery to replace your heart. Be smart, talk to your it people before you do anything rash. They will make your stuff work and run smoother. And btw, take that 100k and give em a bonus. They have earned it. Think how many times they have pulled your butt out of the fire at the last minute, or how they saved something you screwed up. They make you look good.
If your in IT and your CEO reads this and takes my advice:Email me for the address where you can ship the check or freebies ;)
No comments:
Post a Comment