Why so long between updates?

Well, I sit writing this in a hospital waiting room as Judi is in surgery. She is getting arthroscopy on her knee. To say I have been a little uptight and reclusive of late is an understatement. I would say to an extent my sense of humor has gone to hell and my temper has become so short that I have avoided talking with people. I back off when I know I am having one of those times when little things like people saying /Where have you disappeared to?/ piss me off to no end. I go from Bryian to asshole in 2.2 seconds. This is a protective measure I think so I do not say things I would later regret. If you feel slighted by my not being around perhaps this will help put things in perspective. With the past two weeks being loaded with trips to the doctor, work, our normal schedule, MRIs, x-rays and a wedding all thrown in you can begin to see how things can get away from me. No fault here, just the way things are. I sometimes am a little too protective of Judi, especially when she is in pain. I know I have to reign that in now and then. I have had too many good things in my life go to hell in a hand basket in a very short time to ignore her, at least in my own mind. I will not let any inattentiveness cause us problems. As such, my hobbies such as writing, chatting online, games and such have kind of been thrown to the wayside. I understand why and agree the reason is well worth it, but this is my choice. I get what relaxation I can when I can. I try to fence with the team to help and online mindless games seem to help a little. Still there are a lot of things that while innocent in their intention push me over the edge. To know thy self is to know thy enemy. I know I can be a belligerent ass; therefore I try to control it. I also have almost no sympathy for anyone. I can look someone strait in the eye after a heart-rending story that would evoke compassionate responses from even Attila The Hun and calmly say /So?/



Hopefully this puts things in perspective a little for people. A few words of advice do not push me right now. I may react in a way I will regret later. Please, be kind and give me my own time about things and I promise I will return to being me.